Waiting in election limbo: More anxiety than a pregnancy test

It’s no surprise we’re still waiting for official results. But it doesn’t make the limbo of a pandemic-scrambled election easy.

As late-night host Jimmy Kimmel said, it’s like being awake during your own surgery.

Online humor says the outcome of a pregnancy test is awaited with less anxiety.

We have been here before. During the hanging chads of 2000, it took more than a month to know who our next president would be.

But that was then and this is now. Reader Hymie Kavin says he hasn’t felt suspense like this since watching “Psycho.” Sue Wills says her household is taking a break from all news. An email to the paper from Canadian Alisdair Ramsay-Mackenzie says no matter who wins he’s wishing “peace and prosperity” for his “neighbours down below.”

About the only things clear right now:

We showed up in impressive numbers — on track for the highest voter turnout since 1908, according to the U.S. Elections Project.

And rapper Kanye West has conceded with a single word: WELP.

The biggest takeaway so far, though: The most divisive presidential race in recent memory isn’t a landslide either way. Which means half of us sees things a lot differently than the other half, and that many millions of folks can’t all be idiots, despite what each side might be thinking.

Common ground? For starters, how about a universal sigh that at least the campaigning is over?

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No more nasty ads or apocalyptic mailers or annoying text messages — for a while anyway.

One meme is urging people to check one of three options:

I’m a Republican.

I’m a Democrat.

I’m having a glass of wine.

CHECK.

Joanne Kimberlin, 757-446-2338, joanne.kimberlin@pilotonline.com